‘Instead of seeing depression as a dysfunction, see it as a functioning phenomenon. It stops you cold, sets you down, makes you damn miserable.’ - James Hillman
Depression is more than simply feeling unhappy or fed up for a few days. We all go through spells of feeling down, but when you’re depressed, you feel persistently low for weeks or months rather than just a few days.
Some people still think that depression is trivial and not a genuine health condition. They’re wrong. Depression is not a sign of weakness or something you can ‘snap out of’ by ‘pulling yourself together’, it’s a real illness with real symptoms
The good news is that with the right treatment and support, most people can make a full recovery from depression.
Here are five ideas that may help to ease depression:
1. Start with the small things
2. Look for emotional support
3. Catch negative thinking
4. Take care of yourself
5. Stay in the present moment
1. Start with the small things
Recovering from depression requires action. But taking action when you’re depressed is hard. In fact, just thinking about the things you should do to feel better, like going for a walk or spending time with friends, can be exhausting.
It’s the Catch-22 of depression recovery. The things that help the most are the things that are most difficult to do. But there’s a difference between difficult and impossible.
The key to beginning to feel better is to start with a few small goals and slowly build from there. Draw upon whatever resources you have. You may not have much energy, but you probably have enough to take a short walk around the block or pick up the phone to call a friend.
Take things one day at a time. The steps may seem small, but they’ll quickly add up.
2. Look for emotional support
On your own, it can be difficult to maintain perspective and sustain the effort required to beat depression. The very nature of depression makes it difficult to reach out for help. However, isolation and loneliness make depression even worse, so maintaining your close relationships and social activities are important.
The thought of reaching out to friends and relations can seem overwhelming. You may feel ashamed, too exhausted to talk, or guilty for neglecting the relationship. Remind yourself that this is the depression talking. Your loved ones care about you and want to help. You can also confide in a professional such as your GP or therapist. Emotional support from others can often aid recovery.
3. Catch negative thinking.
A depressed person is often caught in a cycle of negative thinking. Aaron Beck, the founder of cognitive behavioural therapy, worked with depressed patients and found that they experienced streams of negative ‘automatic thoughts’ that seemed to pop up spontaneously. ‘I’m useless and inadequate’, ‘nothing works out for me’ and ‘it will never get better’ were examples of what depressed people were continually telling themselves.
Start listening to the critical voice in your head as often as you can. Pay particular attention to any repetitive thought patterns. Be on the lookout for when you slip into a bad mood or become upset. What caused the shift? What happened and, most importantly, what did you start telling yourself after the event? Breaking unhelpful cycles of thought by becoming aware of them and challenging their ‘truth’ can reduce their downing effect.
It’s also worth remembering the author Roderick Thorp’s words - ’We have to learn to be our own best friends because we fall too easily into the trap of being our own worst enemies.’
4. Take care of yourself .
To overcome depression, it’s important to take care of yourself. Eating well as well as getting out walking and exercising can drfinitely keep depression at bay. Push yourself to do things, even when you don’t feel like it and do something you enjoy or used to enjoy. It could be reading, writing, cooking, watching films, drawing, listening to or playing music. These nourishing and uplifting activities can really help.
Neuroscientific research has uncovered evidence that illnesses, such as depression are associated with one half of the brain and that by activating the brain’s healthier other half (or their ‘creative’ side) , a person’s condition may improve. As Jeanette Winterson once said ‘Art saved me; it got me through my depression and self-loathing, back to a place of innocence.’
5. Try to stay in the present moment
‘The past was the present. And the future will be the present. The present moment is the only reality I ever experience. As long as I stay in the present, I am happy forever: because forever is always the present,” said Eckhart Tolle.
We have a tendency to dwell on the past (which we can’t change) or worry about the future. It’s extremely hard to do, but if we can stop projecting into a possible future or reflecting on previous experiences, there will be less fear and anxiety around. In other words, if we can give the past and the future a day off we’re likely to feel much lighter and happier.
And finally…
I’d like to close with the words of a client who came to therapy having been diagnosed as ‘depressed’ by a doctor. ’When you are told you have depression you run the risk of labeling yourself as a depressed person. And that can be dangerous. I’m not pretending that depression isn’t an illness but one of the best things I ever did was to firmly resolve in my mind that depression, like everything else, is a transient phenomena. Like a mist or a cloud in the sky – depression does not last.’